I have a pretty fierce inner beast that can only be described as a restlessness of spirit. It is the legacy a sexual predator left behind in me when he abused me as a 5 year old girl, still in my formative years. The 3 incidents of molestation were so traumatic that I disassociated from my body, creating a split and vivid memories from the heightened experience of fear that have left an indelible impression on my very being. A lifetime of healing has helped me learn how to cope and thankfully I have learned tools to help me manage this beast (after some unhealthy responses like addiction) but I recognize he will always be a part of me. Basically when he takes over I lose my connection to my own divinity and grace. The quickest, most reliable way for me to reconnect to my goodness is to paint the beauty of nature-
In this regard drawing and painting has been a survival technique and one that I established early on in life, as a child~
Art has been my true, loving partner through a lifetime of changing relationships
Nothing calms my spirit quite like painting Mother Nature's beautiful blossoms. I become one with them and I once again feel beautiful and whole~
It is a magical transportation to another realm and I lose all sense of self~
It's as if divinity has flooded my being and I become a channel for Her Love.
It brings me great Peace and is the blessing from the beast who never leaves entirely but is tamed for the time being.
In this regard drawing and painting has been a survival technique and one that I established early on in life, as a child~
Art has been my true, loving partner through a lifetime of changing relationships
Nothing calms my spirit quite like painting Mother Nature's beautiful blossoms. I become one with them and I once again feel beautiful and whole~
It is a magical transportation to another realm and I lose all sense of self~
It's as if divinity has flooded my being and I become a channel for Her Love.
It brings me great Peace and is the blessing from the beast who never leaves entirely but is tamed for the time being.
No comments:
Post a Comment